The way I deal

I have always been a glutton for punishment so to speak. I find myself calling Don's cell phone and work voice mail just to listen to his voice. Today we went to church and had an amazing service. I truly felt Jesus in my heart today and I am so thankful for that. After church we went to Mom's and Aaron went on a Easter Egg Hunt and then we ate. I had a hard time eating becasue I just thought of how much Don loved to eat(especially at my Mom's) and how he wouldn't be able to eat again and it made me sick. We came home and I asked Alex if he cared if I went to Don's parents house and off I went.

I stopped at Don's house and sat in his car and wow it was so weird to smell him and see his car with everything in it. I knocked on the door hoping AJ would be there so I could go in, but no such luck. Then I proceeded to the crash site and just tried to understand everything. Things like this make me feel close to him and I so need that right now. I went to his Dad's and was there for almost 4 hours and it was amazing. I am really not sure who felt better at then end-me or them. He has an amazing family and that is something that we truly had in common. He was so close to his parents and brothers so now I have to make sure that they are all OK. We have assured each other that we will forever be part of each others lives and that I will take the role as the Big sister to Dan and Collin. This is what Don would have wanted of me that much I know for sure and he would have done the same to Krissy. He loved his brothers something fierce and I don't know if anyone other than me really understood that part of him. I have shared so much with them the last 3 days that I feel so good about Don. I am able to share stories and feelings with them that helps them to understand how truly amazing Don was to me and so many other people. I am hoping to go to his house this week to write what I am saying at the funeral. I am not sure how I will get through, but for my Don I have to. Please continue to pray for his family and for me and the rest of his friends. I am praying for now that I am able to get off work on Tuesday and Wednesday so that I can be there for his family through everything-he would do the same for me. This is all about Don and making him proud of us for the way we are choosing to honor him. I am actually looking forward to the service on Wednesday becasue it is truly our day to honor everything that he was to us-just what he would have wanted...minus the stuffing of his body. (Those of you that knew him know exactly what I mean)

Until next time...